Crossroads

Have you ever taken a step back and wondered where time has gone? Every year as one closes out and another begins there is always recaps of the years past, how many years ago something took place, and so on… I look back with the thoughts of what have I done?

It’s easy to trace my work history; no secret where I’ve been or what I’ve done with my career. My desk holds numerous years of paper planners, yes you read correctly, paper planners that not only hold my daily schedule but also each family member’s schedule. Coordinating multiple activities, meetings, obligations and commitments takes more than a quick glance of the calendar on my phone.

Today I ponder the question of what have I really done with my life? I’m not talking about the typical things such as college, family or work. I’m looking beyond that part; what is it I’ve really done. Hmmm…. that is the question that’s difficult to answer as I’m not sure if it’s about me and what I’ve always dreamed of doing, or is it about what I’ve done for others before myself.

Some people talk about the beginning of a new year and wanting a fresh start with a different company or even changing careers. Others say they’re going to focus more on themselves – changes to help move a person in the right direction?

I’ve always wanted to be a full time writer, someone who becomes the author everyone clamors to read; however, I’m continually pulled in a different direction. Maybe the fear of failure is too great or it’s easier to put this dream on hold to take care of my family, make sure I’m doing well at work, or commit myself elsewhere so I won’t fail.

Continually I encourage my children to follow their dreams. To put in the effort and time needed to get where they want to be, and yet I hold back without following my own advice. Maybe that’s where I fall, at the crossroads of time past and what’s ahead.

2 Chronicles 15:7 But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.

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